The Thoughts of Gunnar


The Truth About My Toplessness
September 21, 2008, 6:37 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

Sorry…gotta blog about this.

So, right now, my back window blinds are set as to empower people walking around my apartment complex to see into my pad…and me, at my computer desk.  And what I am wearing?  Socks and shorts…but no shirt.

I have become what I have always feared.  Let me explain.

When I was 20 or so, and in shape, I probably wouldn’t have minded being seen in such a situation.  But now  that I am as pasty white as it gets, and not only have all the chest hair I desired as a youth growing up, but I have lots of hair  where I DON”T WANT IT, like all over my back, this is not as enthralling of a scenario.

Furthermore, my stomach is in such shape and condition now, that I would actually feel much better about it if I had a baby growing inside of me.  Instead, it is just fat.

Growing up, I would always be like, ‘Man, if I get like that, I NEVER will let anyone see me without my shirt on.  It’s just time to kiss goodbye to that  part of my life and not curse others by making them see it.’  Well, someone could right now…but here is my ultra-scary point–I realize that, and I am too lazy and just don’t care enough to shut the blinds.  I have a legitimate shame over my current exposed condition, but at the same time, I have a total carelessness in wanting to impress anyone with my physical self.  There  is a point on that scale that I think one can think of that as Godly…but I am afraid I have passed that point into simply not caring enough.

As a much younger man, I used to shop at expensive clothing stores, be REALLY into my dress and attire, etc.  Now, I get a kick out of getting a decent shirt that has been already used, and I don’t give one flying thought to what I wear.  If it matches, it is a huge bonus.  I am reflecting on this moment how I have pulled a complete 180…mindboggling.

Welcome to the inside  of my mind.

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2 Comments so far
Leave a comment

You crack me up! Keep on writing…you are a funny one.

Thanks for sharing,
Annette

Comment by Annette

hilarious. i’m in this boat. oh vey… off to the gym.

Comment by Jeff Goins




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